A section of the speeches I gave to my Intro students today (keep in mind that it is a remedial math class).
"You are in this class because of one of three reasons. Either one, you are lazy and didn't do your work last year or last semester; two, you skipped class and failed due to attendance or missed material; or three, at some point in your educational career so far, whether it was in elementary school or middle school or at home, you got severely screwed over by either a teacher, your school, and the system."
"Some of you guys didn't have a teacher for an entire year of your education. Others had a teacher that just passed out worksheets and sat in the back of the class. Well I am making a promise to you today that I am not going to be that teacher that quits on your halfway through the semester, that hands you a sheet of work and sits in the back of the room, or tells you that you will amount to nothing. I will do everything I can to make sure that you are as successful as you can be, but you need to fulfill your end of the bargain and work hard with me."
One-on-one with a student, in response to a student saying he didn't like one teacher last semester because she got in his face and told him he wasn't doing anything for himself and wouldn't make it. "Boo, I am not going to get in your face like she did. Well, actually, I might. But if I do it will only be to tell you what an amazing student you can be and how much of a shame it is that you are not living up to the great things you can do. Is it ok if I get in your face for that." Response: nod and shy smile.
Fun one of the day: Student moves tongue in cheek mimicking a sexual endeavor; my response: "Austin, save it for your dreams or for after school." Austin laughed, and returned to the task at hand.
Overall, a solid day, complete with a roommate discussion of just how screwed up our schools and the educational system are.
Monday, January 26, 2009
Sunday, January 25, 2009
First Day Number Two: Bring Out the B
Leadership is about being respected, not liked.
The Pat Summitt of Introduction to Math has arrived in the building.
Disrespect in the classroom for each other, for our mission, or for me will not be tolerated. Get on board, or get out.
First day number two coming up.
Bring out the B.
The Pat Summitt of Introduction to Math has arrived in the building.
Disrespect in the classroom for each other, for our mission, or for me will not be tolerated. Get on board, or get out.
First day number two coming up.
Bring out the B.
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Thoughts from UNCC Grad School Class - Online Forum
How many years have I taught? In the classroom, 0.5, on the court, 6. This first semester of teaching represented my initial attempt to command the attention of 25 students at a time and impart essential academic knowledge. My current challenge deals with 9th graders: resentful, sleep-deprived, hormonal machines.
The teaching philosophy I adapt markedly parallels that of my coaching philosophy. The coach must serve as a paradigm of poise, patience, respect, and endurance for learning. However, the coach, or teacher, in the end may not be the individual from whom a player or student learns best. In fact, rather to the contrary, the greatest learning often is divulged through the support and guidance of a peer. The ideal learning environment through this philosophy, therefore, would consist of peers’, rather than teachers’, not only fostering the understanding of a concept in fellow peers, but actually introducing new ideas and theories. While ideal on paper, this is far more difficult to realize in a classroom outside of one’s fantasies. However, recently I have found my own piece of this dream in my own classroom. Having introduced a student to a new concept in tutorial one afternoon, I relinquished the soap box to this young woman during class the following day. With the attention of 24 adolescents, K. enlightened her classmates about the ways of compound inequalities. This model of peers teaching peers is one that I found to both promote positive class relationships as well as highly affecting teaching and learning. It is one that I will surely make every attempt to repeat in the upcoming semester.
The high school in which I work is far from being a competitive member of the CMS team. It has been targeted as a school that needs immediate drastic improvement; indeed, immediate improvement. Whispered rumors in the copy room of Dr. Gorman’s secret mission to close the school abound. Illegal actions such as restricting access to students’ enrolling in EOC classes for fear of their scoring below proficiency on the EOC have been taken by our principal in order to prevent our school from sinking to the front page headliner “Beyond the Market; Depressed Times for Education: Another School Closes.” In a school with one of the highest free or reduced lunch rates, an often depressed, disillusioned staff, and devastating lack of teachers, one could argue that there is less than a glimmer of hope for our school.
I would like to argue differently. A new teacher recently informed me of her severe distaste for the complacent school culture in reference to the forced curve on math finals. The curve is dramatic, for example changing a 36 to a 60. She passionately pointed out that we will never help students by lowering standards. Teach for America has indoctrinated me with this notion. That makes 2 of us at the school. How many others will it take? The answer: All. Even more than pushing my own students to success I must charge myself to morph the mindsets of fellow teachers to raise their standards and motivate their students to achieve their best, despite incredible obstacles.
To close, three things truly valued by me about teaching are safety, encouragement, and passion. Safety because I have the opportunity to create as safe an environment as I can for my students; an environment where they face no physical or emotional harm. Encouragement because I can serve as a positive motivator in my students’ lives, for some I may be the only one who makes an effort to fill this role. Finally, passion. I can pass on a passion for learning, a passion for change, and most of all, a passion for social transformation that if passed on efficiently and securely, will prepare my students with the reason, will, and academic confidence to create a lasting positive change for the community in which they grew up.
The teaching philosophy I adapt markedly parallels that of my coaching philosophy. The coach must serve as a paradigm of poise, patience, respect, and endurance for learning. However, the coach, or teacher, in the end may not be the individual from whom a player or student learns best. In fact, rather to the contrary, the greatest learning often is divulged through the support and guidance of a peer. The ideal learning environment through this philosophy, therefore, would consist of peers’, rather than teachers’, not only fostering the understanding of a concept in fellow peers, but actually introducing new ideas and theories. While ideal on paper, this is far more difficult to realize in a classroom outside of one’s fantasies. However, recently I have found my own piece of this dream in my own classroom. Having introduced a student to a new concept in tutorial one afternoon, I relinquished the soap box to this young woman during class the following day. With the attention of 24 adolescents, K. enlightened her classmates about the ways of compound inequalities. This model of peers teaching peers is one that I found to both promote positive class relationships as well as highly affecting teaching and learning. It is one that I will surely make every attempt to repeat in the upcoming semester.
The high school in which I work is far from being a competitive member of the CMS team. It has been targeted as a school that needs immediate drastic improvement; indeed, immediate improvement. Whispered rumors in the copy room of Dr. Gorman’s secret mission to close the school abound. Illegal actions such as restricting access to students’ enrolling in EOC classes for fear of their scoring below proficiency on the EOC have been taken by our principal in order to prevent our school from sinking to the front page headliner “Beyond the Market; Depressed Times for Education: Another School Closes.” In a school with one of the highest free or reduced lunch rates, an often depressed, disillusioned staff, and devastating lack of teachers, one could argue that there is less than a glimmer of hope for our school.
I would like to argue differently. A new teacher recently informed me of her severe distaste for the complacent school culture in reference to the forced curve on math finals. The curve is dramatic, for example changing a 36 to a 60. She passionately pointed out that we will never help students by lowering standards. Teach for America has indoctrinated me with this notion. That makes 2 of us at the school. How many others will it take? The answer: All. Even more than pushing my own students to success I must charge myself to morph the mindsets of fellow teachers to raise their standards and motivate their students to achieve their best, despite incredible obstacles.
To close, three things truly valued by me about teaching are safety, encouragement, and passion. Safety because I have the opportunity to create as safe an environment as I can for my students; an environment where they face no physical or emotional harm. Encouragement because I can serve as a positive motivator in my students’ lives, for some I may be the only one who makes an effort to fill this role. Finally, passion. I can pass on a passion for learning, a passion for change, and most of all, a passion for social transformation that if passed on efficiently and securely, will prepare my students with the reason, will, and academic confidence to create a lasting positive change for the community in which they grew up.
Sunday, January 11, 2009
refrigerator poetry
First, thank you so much to those who have shown endless love and support in these tough times. I would not still be here without you.
Second, I have a new air about my teaching. Over winter break, I realized just how unhappy I had been here. This was evidenced in some refrigerator poetry that I wrote with some friends at home. It seemed as though only negative thoughts were in my head:
smelling purple lies there
repulsive lust rips the tongue
will she fall like frantic shadows
stop moon
cry of power
gone
trudge through black winter
time can boil screams
To get a better idea, here is an exert from a recent email I wrote to my program director:
I am constantly uneasy at school, stomach churning and hands shaking between blocks, always on guard for a student to disrespect or emotionally abuse me. With megaphones blaring in the halls, constant verbal and physical conflict among students and ubiquitous complaining and frustration among staff members, I work in a hostile, unwelcoming, and uninspiring environment that breeds depression and ill-will.
However, realizing just how low I had gotten and the pressures that I was putting on myself helped me realize that I need to lighten up and just do the best that I can. If I did absolutely everything that I could, bending over backwards for my students, I would still have kids checked out, not doing anything in class, and disrespecting their classmates and me - and certainly not reaching 80% mastery.
Finals week starts on Wednesday. Time for these students to really crack down.
Second, I have a new air about my teaching. Over winter break, I realized just how unhappy I had been here. This was evidenced in some refrigerator poetry that I wrote with some friends at home. It seemed as though only negative thoughts were in my head:
smelling purple lies there
repulsive lust rips the tongue
will she fall like frantic shadows
stop moon
cry of power
gone
trudge through black winter
time can boil screams
To get a better idea, here is an exert from a recent email I wrote to my program director:
I am constantly uneasy at school, stomach churning and hands shaking between blocks, always on guard for a student to disrespect or emotionally abuse me. With megaphones blaring in the halls, constant verbal and physical conflict among students and ubiquitous complaining and frustration among staff members, I work in a hostile, unwelcoming, and uninspiring environment that breeds depression and ill-will.
However, realizing just how low I had gotten and the pressures that I was putting on myself helped me realize that I need to lighten up and just do the best that I can. If I did absolutely everything that I could, bending over backwards for my students, I would still have kids checked out, not doing anything in class, and disrespecting their classmates and me - and certainly not reaching 80% mastery.
Finals week starts on Wednesday. Time for these students to really crack down.
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Enough with the negative.
Yes, it has been tough. Honestly, this break I have come to the conclusion that perhaps my best move for optimal mental health may be to resign after completing one year...it will all depend on how I am feeling in June.
Nevertheless, I then think about the 90 students at my school whose teacher is on indefinite "sick leave" and has had a substitute hand them worksheets everyday for the past three and a half months. This is atrociously unfair; just another example of the great injustice of our time that is far from truly being discovered by the average US citizen. I know that I am showing up to work (when not sick enough to go to the ER) and trying my best for my students. My classroom management or plan for the day may not be the best, but I will persevere and give these next months my all.
Nevertheless, I then think about the 90 students at my school whose teacher is on indefinite "sick leave" and has had a substitute hand them worksheets everyday for the past three and a half months. This is atrociously unfair; just another example of the great injustice of our time that is far from truly being discovered by the average US citizen. I know that I am showing up to work (when not sick enough to go to the ER) and trying my best for my students. My classroom management or plan for the day may not be the best, but I will persevere and give these next months my all.
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Annnnd now for a new installment of "You Know You Hate Your Job When!..."
This week's topic: You Would Rather Get Appendicitis Than Go To Work.
Indeed, perhaps a little extreme. However, I must admit that when I saw the urgent care doctor's orders that I stay home from work for 3 days I was pretty content...despite the fact that these words came right after the following discharge orders: "To ER for immediate surgical eval.!" My positive attitude was likely driven by the fact that I highly doubted that I actually had appendicitis.
It all began with a horrible Tuesday. 6 hours of less than extreme learning later, I faced an unhelpful TFA focus group and my program director pulling me into a private room to share her concerns, "I just wanted to make sure you're ok." Holding back tears of frustration and exhaustion, I drove home in quite a foul mood. After a near-scalding shower and a quick teary session in front of the roomies, I was heavily encouraged to call in sick on Wednesday. But with true-to-TFA ignorant determination, I said no no, don't be ridiculous, I will attempt to close the achievement gap in the face of any stomach pain or mild depression.
At 4am the next morning, I did not feel the same. Barely able to sit up in bed without crying out in pain, I determined that calling in sick was the appropriate move. Playing along with what most people would do when staying home from work, I visited the urgent care center. My next move was to check myself into the ER, of course, as noted previously.
My awesome roommates joined me to learn that I would need immediate surgery, occurring about 1:30am that night. Waking up from surgery in intense pain the morphine dose was dramatically increased and my groggy, sleep-filled Thursday in the recovery room began. Thankfully, one of my roommates stayed with me through the delirium on Thursday and brought me home.
All in all, everything worked out. I am now home, only a day later than planned, recovering well.
Moral of the story: if you have intense abdominal pain get it checked out immediately and if you would rather be in the hospital than at work - perhaps a career change may be in order...
Indeed, perhaps a little extreme. However, I must admit that when I saw the urgent care doctor's orders that I stay home from work for 3 days I was pretty content...despite the fact that these words came right after the following discharge orders: "To ER for immediate surgical eval.!" My positive attitude was likely driven by the fact that I highly doubted that I actually had appendicitis.
It all began with a horrible Tuesday. 6 hours of less than extreme learning later, I faced an unhelpful TFA focus group and my program director pulling me into a private room to share her concerns, "I just wanted to make sure you're ok." Holding back tears of frustration and exhaustion, I drove home in quite a foul mood. After a near-scalding shower and a quick teary session in front of the roomies, I was heavily encouraged to call in sick on Wednesday. But with true-to-TFA ignorant determination, I said no no, don't be ridiculous, I will attempt to close the achievement gap in the face of any stomach pain or mild depression.
At 4am the next morning, I did not feel the same. Barely able to sit up in bed without crying out in pain, I determined that calling in sick was the appropriate move. Playing along with what most people would do when staying home from work, I visited the urgent care center. My next move was to check myself into the ER, of course, as noted previously.
My awesome roommates joined me to learn that I would need immediate surgery, occurring about 1:30am that night. Waking up from surgery in intense pain the morphine dose was dramatically increased and my groggy, sleep-filled Thursday in the recovery room began. Thankfully, one of my roommates stayed with me through the delirium on Thursday and brought me home.
All in all, everything worked out. I am now home, only a day later than planned, recovering well.
Moral of the story: if you have intense abdominal pain get it checked out immediately and if you would rather be in the hospital than at work - perhaps a career change may be in order...
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Recent Quotes
As I prepare to go to bed before 11 for the first time in the last eight days, I shall recount a few fun quotes from the past week.
"Save it for your sheets tonight!"
-Me, in response to a student beating his desk rhythmically with a grunting, vocal accompaniment. Thankfully, his need to share his sexual frustrations with the class ceased for the moment.
"I don't like poor people." and then later "Shut up, stupid a**, pimple-faced poor m$%^# f#%$."
--Antonio, unleashing intense frustration at a classmate for his admittedly obnoxious and never-ending cursing and poor behavior control. Really Antonio?...do you realize that basic school demographics reveal the vast majority of your peers to be "poor people." Generalizations, no good.
"The administrative staff has received reliable information that there will be gang fights at all lunches today. Please do not share this information with students, as this will cause them to strategically change the locations and times."
--FA administrator in regards to why students were confined to classrooms for lunch today. Although certainly impeding teachers from enjoying those 15 minutes of freedom, this action also made all gang-violence attempts defunct during the lunch hour.
"...but we all know they're all a bunch of Q's!" [chuckle, chuckle]
--again, FA administrator. This time describing a group of male dancers that might bring ballroom dance to enrich the school's boy's club program. And they wonder why students can't stop the jokes about fag#@( and fruit cakes?
"Save it for your sheets tonight!"
-Me, in response to a student beating his desk rhythmically with a grunting, vocal accompaniment. Thankfully, his need to share his sexual frustrations with the class ceased for the moment.
"I don't like poor people." and then later "Shut up, stupid a**, pimple-faced poor m$%^# f#%$."
--Antonio, unleashing intense frustration at a classmate for his admittedly obnoxious and never-ending cursing and poor behavior control. Really Antonio?...do you realize that basic school demographics reveal the vast majority of your peers to be "poor people." Generalizations, no good.
"The administrative staff has received reliable information that there will be gang fights at all lunches today. Please do not share this information with students, as this will cause them to strategically change the locations and times."
--FA administrator in regards to why students were confined to classrooms for lunch today. Although certainly impeding teachers from enjoying those 15 minutes of freedom, this action also made all gang-violence attempts defunct during the lunch hour.
"...but we all know they're all a bunch of Q's!" [chuckle, chuckle]
--again, FA administrator. This time describing a group of male dancers that might bring ballroom dance to enrich the school's boy's club program. And they wonder why students can't stop the jokes about fag#@( and fruit cakes?
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